It’s time for the fastest and craziest hour of Dancing with the Stars ever. The 12 remaining couples will all perform in a series of six Face-Offs, earning scores from the judges. The highest-scoring couple in each Face-Off will win immunity while the low scorers will face elimination. And all of this is taking place in a single hour. There’s no time to waste.

'Dancing with the Stars' Recap: The Week 3 Face-Offs

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With only one hour and 12 routines, there’s no time for filler. The show opens with audio problems. Oops.

Babyface vs.Jana: Jive

Kenny “Babyface” Edmonds and Allison Holker: His footwork is strong, but his upper body is kind of stiff and the transitions aren’t great. It’s one of those routines where there are some strong moments, but the whole thing doesn’t flow.

Jana Kramer and Gleb Savchenko: Her feet aren’t as good as Babyface’s, but they have wonderful chemistry as always and it’s very light and bubbly. However, I’d give the win to Babyface.

There’s no time for judges’ critique, it’s straight to scores. In the event of a tie, head judge Len Goodman is the tie-breaker.

Babyface’s Scores: 7+6+6+6=25
Jana’s Scores: 6+7+6+7=26

Jana and Gleb win Immunity!

Damn, this is going fast. I obviously agreed with Carrie Ann Inaba about who won that round, but the male judges’ out-voted her.

Rick vs. Vanilla Ice: Paso Doble

Rick Perry and Emma Slater: He twisted his ankle real badly in rehearsals. It’s a lot of walking around and throwing his hands in the air. He’s good at that and projecting masculine energy. It’s probably as good as he’s capable of.

Vanilla Ice and Witney Carson: He calls it the “Paso Boble” and she thinks it’s Latin. Their routine is a lot less traditional, more rock ‘n’ roll with a hard edge. It kind of kicks ass. This is no contest.

Rick’s Scores: 6+5+6+6=23
Vanilla’s Scores: 6+6+5+6=23

It’s a tie. Since Len gave Vanilla the higher score, that’s who he chooses to be safe.

Vanilla and Wtiney win Immunity!

He’s darn lucky since he’ll probably be tied at the bottom of the leaderboard.

James vs. Ryan: Cha-Cha-Cha

James Hinchcliffe and Sharna Burgess: It’s adorable watching James pretend that this is a tough battle, while the editors show Ryan being a goofball in rehearsals. Damn, James has swag! This man is a master chameleon in the ballroom. His hips could use a little more wiggle, but it’s another great showing.

Ryan Lochte and Cheryl Burke: Ryan is extremely stiff and has no grace in his movements. This is a runaway as far as I’m concerned.

James’ Scores: 7+7+8+7=29
Ryan’s Scores: 6+7+6+6=25

James and Sharna win Immunity!

That sounds about right, except for the part where Len gave both men the same score. I mean, seriously? I know Ryan has great abs, but still, his six-pack deserved a 6.

Terra vs. Calvin: Viennese Waltz

Terra Jole and Sasha Farber: It’s all about vulnerability. It’s another beautiful routine from these two. Terra is a serious contender and that was magical. So effortless and graceful.

Calvin Johnson and Lindsay Arnold: Lindsay wants to show a kinder, gentler Megatron to beat Terra. He definitely stepped up his game. It’s classy and sophisticated, with very smooth and romantic moves. This is a toss-up, but both deserve to be safe.

Terra’s Scores: 8+7+8+7=30
Calvin’s Scores: 8+8+8+8=32

Calvin and Lindsay win Immunity!

Wow, what a Face-Off. Terra is now second on the leaderboard for the night but is still in danger.

Amber vs. Maureen: Salsa

Amber Rose and Maksim Chmerkovskiy: It’s all about her booty. She can shake it, but she looks lost on the dance floor as always. She has very little confidence when it comes to the choreography and it just looks bad.

Maureen McCormick and Artem Chigvintsev: Her 60-year-old body is already starting to hurt. It’s a much more traditional Salsa, so she gets bonus points for content. But the steps are slow and awkward. She has no real flavor, so it’s a mild Salsa at best, not picante.

Amber’s Scores: 7+6+6+6=25
Maureen’s Scores: 7+7+7+7=28

Maureen and Artem win Immunity!

Can we just give her immunity to Terra?

Laurie vs. Marilu, Tango

Laurie Hernandez and Val Chmerkovskiy: She may be better, but having less life experience might put her at a disadvantage. Ha, Val stole Dere’s trademark EDM Tango concept. It’s another stunning routine and she does a great job taking it seriously.

Marilu Henner and Derek Hough: It’s a classic, intense, brilliant Derek routine. Marilu does a fantastic job and this is an impossible Face-Off to decide.

Laurie’s Scores: 7+8+8+8=31
Marilu’s Scores: 7+7+7+7=28

Laurie and Val win Immunity!

Even with a point deducted for a lift, Laurie wins.

Tomorrow night we’ll actually hear from the judges and get the results as Terra, Marilu, Babyface, Ryan, Amber or Rick will be eliminated. But let’s be honest, it won’t be Terra or Marilu.

THE LEADERBOARD

The stars’ names in bold won Immunity from this week’s elimination.

32: Calvin Johnson
31: Laurie Hernandez
30: Terra Jole
29: James Hinchcliffe
28: Maureen McCormick, Marilu Henner
26: Jana Kramer
25: Kenny “Babyface” Edmonds, Ryan Lochte, Amber Rose
23: Rick Perry, Vanilla Ice

Dancing with the Stars returns for another two-hour results show Tuesday at 8/7c on ABC.

(Image courtesy of ABC)

John Kubicek

Senior Writer, BuddyTV

John watches nearly every show on TV, but he specializes in sci-fi/fantasy like The Vampire DiariesSupernatural and True Blood. However, he can also be found writing about everything from Survivor and Glee to One Tree Hill and Smallville.