There is no better way to open a Bones episode than with B&B in the bedroom with Booth’s tape measure (literally, he’s holding a retractable tape measure) reaching for the sky. In “The Senator in the Street Sweeper,” Booth wants a big screen television in the bedroom, but Brennan doesn’t want his sports interfering with their sports. Ever clever Booth promises to make it worth her while. What, is it my birthday? Dang. Already I’m thinking this is the best episode of the season, which is a pretty tall order since the five we’ve already had have been nothing short of spectacular.
Brennan and Booth getting their grove on is only the beginning of the fun in Bones’ sixth season 11 outing. The case has to do with politics and mining, which turns into a conversation about ‘fracking’ among the Jeffersonian crew, lending itself to all manner of interesting discussions. Speaking of ‘fracking’, Aubrey and Jessica have been sharing their love for Battlestar Galactica (where ‘fracking’ is the curse word-du-jour) and their friendship is turning out to be super sweet without the syrup; a genuine and organic development with promising chemistry. Also of tremendous note is the wonderful Miss Caroline Julian, played by fan favorite guest star Patricia Belcher, who is utterly sassy and maternal.
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Supercalifragilistic Senator in the Street Sweep
The case starts right off with Larry’s brother Darryl and his other brother Darryl (aka the “dumb and dumber” of the Newhart era) as squeamish street sweepers who wind up with the bloody corpse of Democratic Virginia Senator Rick O’Malley in their sweeping brush. Totally gross, but classic Bones material, and we’re off to the races. I’m still grinning about Brennan and Booth calling-in with a triple-header work delay due to fulfilling their blissful marital duties. God bless the neurogenesis in the hippocampus, that’s all I’m saying.
Aubrey Has Plans for the Senate, But First He Needs a Background Check
O’Malley’s wife, Lynette, and his chief of staff, the yummy Eric Morales (Nicholas Gonzalez, Jane the Virgin) are at the O’Malley’s home where the press is already trampling the lawn to get at the skinny about the politico’s scandalous (?) death. Rick had been on edge lately, reports Lynette, and had been spending a lot of time with the party whip, Senator Hayley Winters, played by guest star Brenda Strong (Desperate Housewives).
Aubrey tells Booth on the way to the mansion that he has a clear career path that ends in him becoming a senator himself. Seemingly having nothing to do with Aubrey’s political aspirations, Aubrey is ordered by Caroline to do a background check on squint Ms. Jessica Warren (Laura Spencer), with whom Caroline suspects Aubrey has been getting friendly. The powers that be want to know if she can be trusted to investigate the senator. At least, that’s Caroline’s story.
Senator Winters Requests Brennan at the Interrogation Despite Her ‘Je Ne Sais Quois’
Caroline doesn’t want Brennan anywhere near the politicos, but Senator Winters demands the doctor’s presence. Booth tells Brennan to be her direct self with the senator so he can see what happens if she gets flustered. Brennan gets excited about adding some sauciness to her comments like they do when they go undercover. (There’s that old B&B magic with Brennan trying to be funny and Booth finding her just awkward and adorable.)
Brennan hits Winters right between the eyes with all kinds of accusations without going over the top. Winters was a surgeon before entering politics. Brennan suggests she may be cunning enough to have chopped up O’Malley in such a way as to make it look like a retired surgeon couldn’t have committed the crime. Winters, of course, says let’s go somewhere a little more private.
Aubrey and Jessica Are Adorable Together Even Under Stress
The scene between Aubrey and Jessica when he asks her about the details of a Greenpeace pipe bomb and her free-wheeling psychedelic days touring with a band called “Phish” is impressively tender and intense. Aubrey obviously cares about Jessica and was surprised by what he found. Her candid responses convey her returned feelings for Aubrey and a healthy perspective in regard to her past that only time and maturity can bring. I’ve always liked Jessica, and this cements the deal.
I find myself holding my breath as Aubrey becomes silent while trying to figure out how to present what he’s learned to Caroline. No, neither Aubrey nor Jessica are who they were back then, but will the government see it that way? That’s the weight conveyed by Aubrey’s calculated silence. I have my fingers crossed for these two. Especially if they really are just watching fracking Battlestar Galactica during their shared extracurricular activities. The best relationships start out as friends!
Brennan Wants to Know If Winters and O’Malley Were Lovers
Sitting privately with Winters, Brennan asks if the two senators were doing the horizontal mamba. All evidence shows they were spending a lot of time together. People in power seem to think they are morally above all others, Brennan points out, so were they intimate? Winters says they were not, but thanks for the vote of confidence in my libido, she adds. Boom.
At the previous evening’s fund-raising political event, however, there had been protesters against a debt ceiling amendment that called for decreasing coal emissions. O’Malley had been uneasy about the protesters. He was pro coal miners, but planned to vote for the bill anyway, says Winters. He was so disturbed that he left before the meal was served. Video tape does show that O’Malley left early and was accosted by a super big protester.
Who Doesn’t Stinkin’ Love Caroline?
“I can’t stand Caroline Julian,” said no Bones viewer ever. The DA is at the top of her game in this episode whether she’s taking Brennan’s admitted sexual tally in stride, doling out verbal affection for sweet Seeley “Superman” Booth, or mother-henning Aubrey’s career in the most professional way possible. Her firecracker repartee with key characters on this show is endearingly heart-tugging at times, and hilarious at others. Here we have quintessential Caroline.
It turns out that the background check Caroline ordered Aubrey to do on Jessica was for Aubrey’s benefit after all. Caroline was just looking out for his future. She wants him to have a good woman by his side. “Are you asking me out?” Aubrey cajoles Caroline. Best comeback ever: “Cher, you couldn’t handle me.” Mama Caroline loves her boys and nothing is getting in their way if she has anything to say about it.
Is the Lobby Mook Behind O’Malley’s Offing?
Caroline recognizes the bully at the protest accosting O’Malley as Frankie Cesari, the president of the coal mining lobby in Virginia. This guy evaded embezzling charges by making his accuser disappear when Caroline was trying to prosecute him. She doesn’t trust the mook any further than she can throw him, but his alibi checks out. Besides, it’s too early for the case to be solved.
Brennan is Precious About Jessica’s Relationship Concerns
Jessica admits being emotionally unstable because Aubrey’s background check might affect their future relationship, though she doesn’t say it outright. In a veiled discussion about probabilities of success, she questions the wisdom of pursuing success against the odds, inspiring Angela to give one of her magical pep talks. Enfin, Brennan figures out that it’s not really a discussion about statistics, but about Jessica’s relationship with Aubrey. Holy hamate, is Brennan precious when she figures out what’s really being discussed and gives Jessica a reason to call her new love interest. Gahhhh.
O’Malley’s $2,000/Month Secret Opens Her Mouth
Anissa, a waitress at a restaurant that serves pigeon heads and smells like feet, is O’Malley’s biological daughter. She was the product of a one-night stand and only learned her father’s identity four years previously. She and dad were meeting regularly to get to know each other. He was also helping her with her college expenses. That is all. She was the last person he was with the night he was killed.
Lots of Trauma Discovered On O’Malley’s Remains
Senator O’Malley defended himself during his attack during which he was chopped, received a blunt blow to the head, and was poisoned with a needle behind the ear. Guess who has access to hospitals and rare injectables? Senator Winters … but is she the culprit? You have to admit she’s looked guilty since day one. My money is on either her or the wife. And I’m almost right. Read on.
Political Future Be Damned, Aubrey Is On Fire
Booth warns Aubrey to be careful about whatever he does as an agent because anything can come back to bite him in the ass when he decides to go into politics. Regardless, Aubrey becomes a ballsy Rottweiler when he and Booth hit O’Malley’s house and find Senator Winters about to have Lynette O’Malley crowned her husband’s successor. (I LOVE Ass-kicking Aubrey! ) Now the only question remaining is, which woman killed him, and where they planning it together?
Despite Being Emotionally Fit as a Fiddle, Jessica’s Focus Is Fidgety
Despite Jessica finally feeling somewhat better about herself and Aubrey, she and Brennan determine that there may have been three weapons … or, if we can trust Brennan to go with a timely ‘vibe’ (say it ain’t so!) … possibly just one weapon that chops, bashes, pokes, and leaves traces of blue stain deep inside wounds. And, wouldn’t you know it? It would have to be some kind of statue in order to have all the strange edges that would make all of those injuries. Also, it was made out of a special kind of coal that turns human tissue blue. Who would have thunk it?
The Butler, er, the Chief of Staff Is the Guilty Party
It turns out the lady politicos in this scenario are 100% innocent of the whole deal. It was the sexy chief of staff, Morales, who socked it to O’Malley because he was planning to vote against the party by rejecting the amendment requiring decreasing mining emissions. It just so happens that Morales was fracking Mrs. O’Malley and thought they’d live happily ever after with her as a senator and him by her side. The murder weapon was a statue of the state of Virginia made out of coal, of course.
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Aubrey and Jessica Put A Tingle in the Tummy
That last scene with Aubrey and Jessica in the pigeon restaurant gave me tickles in my tummy. They are quietly sizzling together. Reminds me of another young anthropologist-special agent team not so long ago. Seriously, they are different from Brennan and Booth, but the chemistry is palpable. I predict this commingling of camaraderie will prove to have substantial legs going forward. Kudos to Bones for successfully introducing a respectable (read: non-slapdash or sex-centric) and meaningful relationship that viewers will invest in. I’m way more drawn to Aubrey and Jessica’s budding romance than I was to Arastoo and Cam’s. Will wonders ever cease?
Brennan Leases a Bedroom Television On One Condition …
In our final scene, Brennan surprises Booth with a super huge flat screen TV right there in the boudoir and directly across from the bed. Rather than paying for it outright, she’s leased it on the contingency that the frequency, and (one can only hope) the quality of their conjugal unions don’t fall below a certain level. This scenario lends itself nicely to erection comparisons with remote controls of course, and it looks like the Booths may have just surrendered to the reality of what constitutes acceptable adult bedroom behavior when married people have careers, small children, and aging bodies. It is an absolute joy to see the sexiness returning to Bones this season. Can I get an ‘Amen!’ on that, fellow Boneheads?
(I understand that the Kamasutra is available in HD … and when they are finished with that, there are some early seasons of a certain prime time crimedy romance show that have been known to put people in the mood to get their Marvin Gaye on. Wink)
Bones airs Thursday’s at 8pm on FOX.
(Images courtesy of FOX)
Contributing Writer, BuddyTV