The big question tonight: will Andy Dick or Victor Ortiz be eliminated. Andy was the butt of no less than three “just don’t be the worst” jokes last night, including one from Len himself. Everyone’s written him off, and his lackluster samba did him no favors.
Victor, on the other hand, is a perfect vacuum of talent, charisma and anything resembling investment or effort. His segments range from boring to awkward, and his partner Lindsay frequently appears on the edge of strangling him. He’s bad at dancing, he’s not getting better, and he has all the personality of a sullen teenager. Not to tip my hand here, but I’m ready for him to go.
Our live blog starts now:
Our first unrelated musical performance of the evening comes courtesy of U.K. pop singer Olly Murs, singing his Top 40 hit “Troublemaker.” The protagonist of the song is attracted to a beautiful woman, but alas, she proves to be a problematic romantic interest. Poor devil.
Now for some results:
Safe:
Kellie and Derek
Aly and Mark
How ’bout that.
Last night was Stevie Wonder night, and the guest of honor seems to have enjoyed his time on the show. He floats the idea of returning as a contestant — maybe he’s joking, but I think it could work.
Team Paso got the encore apparently, which is something of a surprise. The men are no more in sync tonight, though they are, to their credit, just as shirtless — I suspect that pushed them over the edge. Zendaya suffers a minor wardrobe malfunction, losing her neon jumpsuit tail or whatever that was.
Safe:
Zendaya and Val
In Jeopardy:
Sean and Peta
We then have a showcase of the crew behind the scenes. I like the idea of giving them a time to shine, though it’s somewhat undermined by only including celebrities in the talking heads.
Now it’s time for a performance from will.i.am, featuring a video of Justin Bieber. The rapper/producer and motion picture recording team up for a song called “That Power,” which might as well be about brushing one’s teeth or Nigerian politics for all the difference it makes, it’ll still be an inescapable hit at the club.
In Jeopardy:
Victor and Lindsay
Safe:
Ingo and Kym
The sponsored Stars of Dance segment is pretty good tonight, combining hip-hop moves with marching band formations — maybe next time they can get some brass instruments out there and break dance to some Sousa.
We then have a Latin Routine that seems to draw heavily on Mel Gibson’s Apocalypto. The pyrotechnics and and fire-breathing are cool and all, but we didn’t have time for one interview with a camera guy in the crew segment?
Safe:
Jacoby and Karina
In Jeopardy:
Andy and Sharna
No big surprise, but still a bit of a bummer. Time to for the final results:
Safe:
Andy and Sharna
And the crowd explodes. This board’s Andy fans are clearly not alone in rooting for him.
Victor Ortiz is eliminated.
As is appropriate. We have a standing ovation here, which not how a crowd traditionally expresses disapproval when someone they like is eliminated.
Victor seems pleased as punch to be eliminated, his face lighting up with enthusiasm for the first time in weeks. Best of luck to him in the boxing world, I suspect he’ll be more at home there.
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(Image courtesy of ABC)
Contributing Writer, BuddyTV
