On this week’s premiere episode of Ringer, that empty Sarah Michelle Gellar-sized hole in our hearts is filled with not one but TWO Sarah Michelle Gellars! Twins, mysteries and more start off CW’s new fall series, Ringer.

Meet the Sisters

We meet Bridget where I happen to meet a lot of lovely ladies, an AA meeting. We also meet her super hunky strong cup of coffee Malcolm, who is her sponsor.  After their meeting, we find out that Bridget is in a bit of hot water and is supposed to be a key witness in the murder trial of Maccawi, the super scary Native American.

The head officer watching her is Victor, who is played by Mr. Eyelashes himself, Nestor Carbonell. While being guarded in a hotel, Bridget uses some secret off-screen jiujitsu to knock out a cop and flee to the Hamptons to meet up with her more well-off, but more unfortunately named sister Siobhan (somehow pronounced Shavon). 

They haven’t spoken for six years and soon have a nice conversation in a bathroom mirror with each other, all the while I keep hoping for a CGI-filled re-enactment of the Intolerable Cruelty lesbian kiss with two Gellars. Now that would be entertainment! But also incest. Now I’m conflicted. They soon take a nice, quiet green screen boat ride on the water and Bridget wakes up to find Siobhan missing, leaving an empty bottle of pills behind.

The Ol’ Switcheroo

As a woman on the lamb, Bridget does the next logical thing and assumes her sister’s identity. This makes that fact that no one knows she exists very convenient.  It is at her new palatial home that she meets her English husband Andrew. As a truly loving husband the first thing he notices after a trip to London is that she is Skeletor thin. What a catch.

Bridget then goes on to meet her new best friend Gemma, who must have been cast from a previous role on one of the Real Housewives series. Aftewards, Bridget freaks out and calls Malcolm for advice and notices that a strange man is staring at her from the street, which is another way I meet women (this show is tailor-made for me!). We learn that he is Henry, Gemma’s husband, who Siobhan is having an affair with.

So Close, Yet So Far

Victor tracks down who he thinks is Chiffon — excuse me, I mean Siobhan — to ask her if she knows anything about where Bridget could be. Bridget-Siobhan tells Victor that they haven’t spoken in months and that she has no idea. We do get a tasty little tidbit out of the conversation that Bridget used to be a prostitute, and has been given immunity for her testimony in the Maccawi case. Before they end their conversation, Victor tells her that Bridget won’t get far from either him or Maccawi. All the while Bridget is sitting there laughing and doing cart wheels in her head. Oh, to be a criminal mastermind!

The Results Are In: You ARE the Father!

So there is one con that we find out that Bridget may have a hard time replicating. Before her great Houdini act, Siobhan went to the doctor for a little blood work and, lo and behold, she’s preggers! About four months along says the doc. Now, not only does Bridget have to start spending more time at the Chinese buffet, but she has to figure out who would have been the father of the baby.  Is it cold and distant Andrew, or needy and constantly-around Henry?  I guess the only way they could find out is if the baby had an English accent or not when it cries. But since Siobhan, and the baby with her, is gone, there is no way of knowing.

The Attack

Ringer starts off with a bit of a tussle between Bridget and a masked hoodlum in a loft, and that is also how the show ends. Bridget shoots the attacker and soon finds out that he had a picture of his target, Siobhan (or is it Bridget)! What are the odds that both sisters are running from henchmen that want to kill them? The episode ends with a quick cut to Paris, where we learn that not only is Siobhan still alive, but she may be possibly pulling the strings for all of this. PLOT TWIST.

On the next episode of Ringer, we try to stop thinking about Buffy when we see SMG at first glance, and also learn more about what Siobhan was getting into before she fled, while Bridget struggles to assume her identity.

Chase Gamradt
Contributing Writer

(Image courtesy of CW)

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Contributing Writer, BuddyTV